Whether you own up to it or not, tough guy, we’re all scared of something. The most popular phobias deal with creepy crawlers, heights, various social situations and flying. In one top ten list of phobias, Arachnophobia (fear of spiders) and Ophidiophobia (fear of snakes) claimed the gold and silver medals. Acrophobia (fear of heights), Pteromerhanophobia (fear of flying), and Mysophobia (fear of germs) can be found on the list as well.
But what about the intangible phobias? Ya know, the ones that are just completely out in left field and you can’t even imagine meeting an individual with that kind of nonsensical fear. You wonder if someone is making this shit up. Still, I think some things in life, like Peladophobia (fear of bald people) are just too bizarre to conjure up on your own- and my heart goes out to these frightened people!
Hopefully without offending a victim, here are some of the funniest phobias around:
Dendrophobia- Fear of Trees.
- I think these people have seen one too many episodes of Legends of the Hidden Temple. There are no temple guards waiting for you in the trees of the Dark Forest, I promise. Still, I’d rather be taken by this disease than be a dendrophiliac… barf.
Pogonophobia- Fear of Beards.
- What? Is it the scruff? Too razor-like for ya? Afraid you’ll cut yourself? Or are you afraid of what’s hiding beneath the bush? Some even believe that after 9/11 the fear only heightened its existence in already suffering lives.
Lachanophobia- Fear of Vegetables.
- Well, I used to hate broccoli too but I got over it.
Cometophobia- Fear of Comets.
- Really? I mean, when is the last time you saw one? Haley’s Comet only swings by our neck of the universe every 76 years! I think you’ll be okay.
Emetophobia- Fear of Vomiting.
- How?! Why?! It feels so good to get it out! So what do you do if you have to puke? You just swallow it back down until your stomach implodes?
Genuphobia- Fear of Knees.
- Hey, I guess they’re pretty creepy
Koinoniphobia- Fear of Rooms.
- Where do you live?
Oneirogmaphobia- Fear of Wet Dreams.
- HAHA. Those poor people.
Pteronophobia- Fear of Being Tickled by Feathers
- Bird Flu?
Vestiphobia- Fear of Clothing.
- I’m guessing these people work from home
And to top it off, in light of this festive season:
TURKEY PHOBIA. Although you won’t find it on the official phobia list, it is a fear of not cooking the turkey properly and disappointing your hungry relatives.
As for us college students, we are liking to fall victim to Epistemophobia (fear of knowledge), and Scolionophobia (fear of school). But we should never succumb to Dipsophobia (the fear of drinking).
photo thanks to: www.aksenate.org
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